my journal...what the hell else would I call it

Bottom


My compassion is broken now. My will is eroded,
and my desire stolen and it makes me feel ugly.
I'm on my knees and burning.
My piss and moans are the fuel that set my head on fire.
So smell my soul burning.
I'm broken, looking up to see the enemy.
I have swallowed the poison you feed me ...
but I survive on it ,
and it leaves me guilt fed, hatred fed, weakness fed..
and I feel ugly, and dead inside.

Shit adds up at the bottom.

You've left me no choice but to go inside and rebuild
what's broken.
Too much , too far , too late to lie down now.
I must arm myself to fight you
by making weapons out of my imperfections.
It's all I have left.
There's no other choice.
I'm shameless, nameless, nothing, and noone now.
But my soul must be iron for my fear is naked.
I'm naked and fearless.
But I'm dead inside.
You see.. shit adds up, now I'm dead inside.
Hatred, weakness, and guilt keep me alive
at the bottom.

I have a choice to make, and it won't be easy. Either way im gonna regret it..

Boo!

Well i 'spose it's nout time i update this lj of mine. Hmmmmm...what to say. Well Mr. Timothy is completely in need of a gf (anyone who is interested) hes starting to annoy me, cause he thinks i can hook him up. And he basically wants me to tell him who to like. In other news, i think Randi and I are done fighting, which is very nice. I do miss being friends with her. We actually had a conversation yesturday! :) Hmmmm...Sam and I are doing fine....for all who wondered, in fact i believe im going to her house today. I am excited, whenever i go there there are cookies!!!!! Grrr on Friday i have to perform a scene from Romeo and Juliet. Our class has to do the closing scene with the princes speech...guess who is the prince? I'm the only one with lines...sigh. And these idiot actor/helper people keep thinking of dumber and dumber things for me to do. I have to caress 2 goddam dead peoples heads! This sucks. But otherwise this has been my longet entry, and i am slightly happy lately. w00t go me.

Suck and suck.
Suckin up all you can, suckin up all you can suck.
Workin up under my patience like a little tick.
Fat little parasite.

Suck me dry.
My blood is bruised and borrowed. You thieving bastards.
You have turned my blood cold and bitter,
beat my compassion black and blue.

Hope this is what you wanted.
Hope this is what you had in mind.
Cuz this is what you're getting.
I hope you're choking. I hope you choke on this.

Taken all I can, taken all I can, we(?) can take.
Taken all you can, taken all you can fuckin' take
Got nothing left to give to you.
Blood suckin parasitic little tick/blood suckin parasitic little tick
Take what you want and then go.

Hope this is what you wanted.
Hope this is what you had in mind.
Cuz this is what you're getting.

Suck me dry.
Is this what you wanted?
Is this what you had in mind?
Cuz this this is what you're getting.
I hope you choke.


hehe this goes out to a certain lying bitch...you know who you are...have a nice day

:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)

wow live journal kinda sucks...anywho...um yea

heartbroken again...sigh...why do i keep trying, and keep waiting, and keep trying again its certainly not helping me. is it o hard for anyone to just give me a chance! am as disgusting as my stepmom says i am? or a i just nothing?

who am i to you? im just curious

godammit...ill wait..........

should i or shouldnt i? i need you to leave a comment...yes or no